40days

Missing my dad as the days go by. Its already passed 40 days since hes gone. It felt so empty. Since hes the only one I turned to whenever im at the bottom of this life. I never thought that I could lose him in just seconds. I forgot about God. That He can take whatever he wants, whoever, whenever.

Back to the old days when the doctor called us all, the moment I came in to see daddy, hes just laying on bed. With the oxygen and all the needles and drips, my tears came rolling down to my face. I felt so sad to see him in such condition. Dad can still see me. He heard me. And thats the moment I wont forget ever, he said "Dont cry. Everything will be okay." Makes me cry even harder. Hes still trying to comfort me with his lies. He lied. And all tears just wont dry.

That was my darkest moment. My birthday this year was so sad. In case if anyone wanna know. I spent all day with my family. But with daddy just laying on bed in pain. I have hoped and made a wish. For my daddy to be healed. I thought I could make a wish on my birthday. I have spent the whole day with tears. Its all very unexpected. He was the strongest man I ever know. I never thought that I could lose him. And I never believed that till now. I dont want to. Dad is still here with us. He will always be here, with us. Always.